Kids Overcome Exclusions

Divorce is harder on children when a parent

  • is required to have no contact with the family
  • is prohibited from making temporary arrangements that include the children
  • is prohibited from setting a temporary separation

A parent who tries to alienate the child from the other parent commits a form of emotional abuse.  This form of emotional abuse programs the child for these conditions:

  • lifelong alienation from a loving parent
  • lifelong psychiatric disturbance
  • to become enmeshed with the alienating parent
  • to take on the alienating parent's hatreds, emotions and desires
  • to be unable to distinguish his own feelings from that of the alienating parent

A child who is fully alienated from one parent by the other

  • does not wish to have contact with the alienated parent
  • expresses only negative feelings for the alienated parent
  • expresses only positive feelings for the alienating parent
  • loses the range of feelings for both parents that most children have

To deprive a child of a healthy relationship with one parent is

  • is psychologically harmful to the child
  • endangers the mental health of the parents
  • threatens the child's psychological development
  • causes the child to believe he/she must choose which of the two parents he/she will love more.

The harm on the child is the same regardless of why a parent may choose to exclude the other parent from the child's life.

To have to choose between parents to exclude one parent from the child's life creates injury that cannot be repaired.


For each problem discussed here, remedies exist to help parents and children  adjust to the changes.  The thing is to get through the pain of the divorce and move on with their lives.  Our workbooks for Moms and for Dads 

  • ask the important questions that point to problems

  • leave it up to parents to decide what to do

  • point out self-defeating reactions

  • give ways to spot problems and solutions

  • give ways to get past the pain

  • show ways to create resolution dramas

As with our workbooks for children and for teenagers, Love Energy and Light are the prevailing resources we apply.

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