Divorce is harder on children when a parent
- is required to have no contact with the family
- is prohibited from making temporary arrangements that include the
- is prohibited from setting a temporary separation
A parent who tries to alienate the child from the other parent
commits a form of emotional abuse. This form of emotional abuse
programs the child for these conditions:
- lifelong alienation from a loving parent
- lifelong psychiatric disturbance
- to become enmeshed with the alienating parent
- to take on the alienating parent's hatreds, emotions and desires
- to be unable to distinguish his own feelings from that of the
A child who is fully alienated from one parent by the other
- does not wish to have contact with the alienated parent
- expresses only negative feelings for the alienated parent
- expresses only positive feelings for the alienating parent
- loses the range of feelings for both parents that most children have
To deprive a child of a healthy relationship with one parent is
- is psychologically harmful to the child
- endangers the mental health of the parents
- threatens the child's psychological development
- causes the child to believe he/she must choose which of the two parents
he/she will love more.
The harm on the child is the same regardless of why a parent may
choose to exclude the other parent from the child's life.
To have to choose between parents to exclude one parent from the
child's life creates injury that cannot be repaired.
For each problem discussed here, remedies exist to
help parents and children adjust to the changes. The thing is
to get through the pain of the divorce and move on with their lives.
Our workbooks for Moms and for Dads
ask the important questions that point to problems
leave it up to parents to decide what to do
point out self-defeating reactions
give ways to spot problems and solutions
give ways to get past the pain
show ways to create resolution dramas
As with our workbooks for children and for teenagers,
Love Energy and Light are the prevailing resources we apply.